"Love through bodily functions"

I'm sure that many times you have seen people spitting on the street. Now many people, mostly in an older population would find this very Rude. I mean SPITTING on a STREET! Now others in fact would not find bodily functions rude at all, and as for spitting they find it so tasteful that they will SPIT ON THEMSELVS or their belongings.

Now, on this particular day, I was feeling quite low. As I walked into the office (RS Marketing) I found myself wanting to get rid of the extra saliva in my mouth. As I went to spit to the side, I found a my friend (Dan aka MAYO) running up next to me, but it was too late, so instead of spitting on Mayo, i spit on myslef. After this event I felt quite alot more relieved and happy. Now many of you would find this quite discusting, but if we look further into my family we will find more evidance of "Love through bodily functions."

For example, one beautiful day, my sister was doing laundry! Something she rather loved to do, on this particular day though, she had a cold. As she was hanging her husbands clothes to dry she violently sneezed. Now she loves her husband very much. Unlike me she did not sneeze on herself, rather, because of her love for her husband, she sneezed directly on his shirt leaving a treat for him to find at a later time. As you can see, more "love through bodily functions."

As I'm sure your thinking, i have two sisters, WHAT ABOUT THE OTHER ONE!? While Courting her soon to be Husband, my other sister decided to display her love for him. While lying beside her beau, she let one go, LOUDLEY! She wanted to display her love so EVERYONE would know. For some reason, her beau did not understand this display of affection and proceeded to thrust her off the couch onto the concrete floor. We now understand that this "love" was not understood by him, and was not aware of "love through bodily functions."

I do not suggest doing this around people who are only aquantiances, but rather only ones you truely love. So the next time your best friend burps so loud you think it was a garage door opening, realize they are only expressing their exuberant love for you.